Do Second and Third Marriages Fail More Often?
In the U.S., 50 percent of first marriages, 67 percent of second, and 73 percent of third marriages end in divorce. See this link: http://www.divorcerate.org/
What are the reasons for this progressive increase in divorce rates? One common explanation is that people enter a second or third marriage "on the rebound" following a failed relationship. The problem arises when people are emotionally hurt from a divorce, and easily swayed by a new relationship; they do not allow sufficient time to recover from their divorce or adjust to being single before getting married again. I have previously suggested that you be comfortable with staying home alone on a Friday or Saturday night alone with just yourself and a good book as a test to determine whether you are ready for a new relationship. People often hastily enter another marriage for the wrong reasons, not having learned lessons from their past experience. They may repeat mistakes, leading to similar conflicts, and possibly another failed relationship. It is important to take time to take stock of yourself, understand what went wrong in your last relationship and be able to recognize possibly similar problems in your next relationship.
Another possible explanation is that some people don’t consider divorce devastating, rather they consider it an event that they can cope with easily. Having already been through it once, and managed to handle it, they figure that they can deal with it again. Often people have become attuned to the warning signs of a bad relationship and may be faster to take steps to mitigate the damage to their life. People that are highly educated, have professional degrees, or careers in business, are more likely to cope with a divorce, by removing the emotional component that often makes divorce so difficult, and by using a logical decision making process rather than an emotional decision making process.
Another possible reason is that as men and women become more self sufficient, with women enjoying successful careers and making salaries comparable to their spouses, and men becoming proficient in home making, the gender gap is closing and the need for a marriage partnership is diminished.
Possibly the main reason for the breakup of second and third marriages is that children are normally born to married couples during their first marriage, and this tends to bind them together for the sake of the children. In the second and third marriage, couples do not have to stay together for the sake of the children, nor do they have the common bond that exists with a married couple raising children. Worse yet, children from a first marriage may doom a second or third marriage. New spouses and their children may have conflicts, jealousy and compete with the children from the first marriage, resulting in a deterioration of the second marriage. Have you ever heard of the term "wicked stepmother" ? or "evil step father"? Have you ever heard of children being cheated out of an inheritance because the second wife or second husband took everything? Is any wonder why second and third marriages fail?
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